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Touched by an Alien - Gini Koch Review: This book has been on my TBR list for quite a while. I haven’t read it sooner for the simple reason that my daughter refuses to read books about aliens. (They are too real, go figure.) I did, however, manage to get the gals (and guys) over at the GoodReads group Girls, Guns, & Grimoires to make this Book of the Month, so reading along was kinda obligational. And, I am glad I did. I enjoyed it. Probably not quite as much as I wanted to, but I did enjoy it.

I loved the “Men in Armani” set up for the story. It definitely brought along vibes of Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones and the accompanying grins and giggles. There is definitely snark to be found between the pages. Our heroine’s family has 4 (big) dogs. And, ya just gotta love Kitty.

But, somehow, somewhere along the way it became just a bit too contrived with too many beautiful people for me. All the Alpha Centauris, or A-Cs as they are more often called, are gorgeous. I mean heart-stoppingly good looking. Now, push out your bottom lip. Really, really, REALLY ridiculously good looking. Yet, the gorgeous women (scientists) want nothing to do with the A-C men because - wait for it - they are not smart enough. They prefer less attractive earth men. Yep. It is a geek paradise buried down in Area 51 – all sorts of gorgeous females looking for nothing beyond intelligence in their men. This, of course, leaves all these hunks looking beyond their race for their love interests. Enter one Katherine, Kitty, Katt.

Mr. Armani immediately falls for Kitty. I mean immediately. This goes beyond love at first sight. Mr. Armani’s cousin also has a ‘thing’ for her. Let the eye rolling commence.

These guys immediately take Kitty under their wing. They also immediately take her parents under their wing. And their menagerie of pets. Which, did I mention, includes 4 large dogs? These dogs include a pit bull named Duchess. Ok, I must make mention that I am a sucker for dogs. Especially pit bulls. So, I really appreciated this view of this misunderstood breed: “I thought pit bulls were deadly killers,” he said as he put her down.” “Only if they’re trained to it. Otherwise, you’re in greater danger of being licked to death.” Yep. That fits the ones I’ve known.

Back to the story – There is a lot of action as we chase after the supreme bad guy, auspiciously named Mephistopheles. There really isn’t a lot of mystery or suspense, just kick assery. And, our Ms. Kitty is quickly elevated to the leader of our expedition to take out the villain. With hair spray. Extra hold hair spray. I must admit to enjoying the ride – there is much snark to be found.

However, the amount of belief that must be suspended to ‘buy’ that all these guys are ridiculously good looking yet want intelligence in their ‘significant others’ was more than I could easily do. Added to that, the speed with which these advanced beings with talents and experience beyond our years throws out their game plan and starts listening to Kitty was mind-boggling. Yes. I can believe in aliens. And parasites. Just don’t give me gorgeousness and leadership. Those I cannot swallow.

In addition to being gorgeous, these dudes are apparently the best lovers ever to have graced the planet. And, with two hearts, they have lots of stamina. Sigh. Moreover, we are shown all this in glowing detail. I much prefer the sex to go on behind closed doors. A private moment for people to share. Furthermore, it really felt like the sex was thrown in not to advance the story, but just for the sake of putting sex in. While I can tolerate it if there is purpose, without purpose it just annoys me.

I really, REALLY wanted to love this book. In fact, it may well have suffered because I anticipated loving it more than I did. There are already six more nice sized novels in the series, amply providing me a refuge from life. I’m not entirely convinced I care enough to seek said refuge here.

I would rate it 3.5 stars – but I am rounding down due to extraneous sex.

Funny thing about this book . . . Even though I did an immense amount of eye rolling while reading it, it did make me smile. And, here a week after I finished it, I still think about it with a smile on my face. So, feel free to roll your eyes, but prepare yourself for a wild ride.